An Open Letter to Thorvald Ingwe, published in A Sealions Tale Jan 94
Our agents in the Barony report that you, the sometime court musician of Axemoor, find the wines of Viking Vineyard to be vinegar. Unlike the Baron of Axemoor I have no with to foist things upon those whom do not want them. I had considered a trade embargo to spare subjecting you, or any others in Axemoor who share your opinion, to my wines. The kind words of the editor of the Bayou Tapestry, to whom I bear no enmity, causes me to forebear.
However, I can not overlook your insulting charge that I am Baroness Isolde’s “chief sycophant.” As I have only a Grant of Arms and hold no office I merely show Baroness Isolde the deference due a peer and a seneschal.
I realize that one can not expect any better from someone who has not the first inkling of proper manners, but still I feel I can not leave your insult go by unanswered.
I do not believe that you are one of Axemoor fighters, and as it has been many years since I laid down the Sword it doesn’t matter. I therefore challenge you, Thorvald Ingwe, to meet me on the day of the War of the Pearls and we shall vie in a contest of archery prowess, your rapid fire (and wildly erratic) long bow against my deliberate and deadly accurate crossbow.