Now I shall tell two more tales about Baron Beorn Collenfehrth and then, I shall leave the poor man alone for awhile. As I stated in the tale of the Hammerhold Ceilidhe, interesting things seemed to happen whenever Axemoor visited Hammerhold. Both of these incidents took place at Hammerhold events.
Baron Beorn is known with affection as, "The World’s Oldest Boy Scout." This is because he holds himself to the highest standard of chivalry and courtesy. This shows itself in the way he acts toward other people, especially the faire sex. Such high standards make him the perfect foil for those whose humor takes a more rakish turn, most notably his squires.
Once at a Hammerhold event, Isolde walked into the shower room to start her morning toilette. Squire Esteban was already there trimming his beard while Sir Beorn was just finishing his morning shower.
Isolde was about to retreat for the sake of discretion when Esteban, realizing that Beorn was about to emerge from the shower, said "Ah! The Baron needs a baronial bath attendant," and thrust Beorn's towel into Isolde's hand.
Isolde had no time to thrust the towel back to Esteban as Beorn, all unawares, was already pulling the shower curtain aside. She held the towel in one hand and discretely turned away, only to face the bank of mirrors above the sink!
Isolde reports that she now knows where Baron Beorn starts to blush. If you wish to know where that is, you'll have to ask Isolde. She has not divulged the information and I have not the nerve to ask.
There was at one time in Axemoor, a lady with an Egyptian persona whose name was Knedeptina. Knedeptina had a very slim figure which meant, not to put too fine a point on it, she was rather small breasted. Like most ladies so endowed, Knedeptina was a bit sensitive about it.
One morning at a Hammerhold event, Knedeptina arose before everyone else and went into the shower room to start her morning ablutions. She did not want to run the shower, fearing that the noise might disturb those still sleeping, so she opted for a sink bath.
Meanwhile, Baron Beorn had awakened and also headed for the shower room. He walked in on Knedeptina who by this time was stripped to the waist. Knedeptina gave a startled, "OOH!", and covered her breasts with her hands.
Baron Beorn, being the courteous, chivalrous knight he is, wished to relieve Knedeptina's embarrassment at this turn of events. Unfortunately, he said the first thing that came to his mind which is frequently a bad idea.
"If you hadn't reacted, I never would have noticed." said the good Baron.
Baron Beorn virtually flew from the shower room to the accompaniment of every loose object that Knedeptina could hurl at him.
A few years later, Gordon Blackwolf the Disrespectful and Antonia Martin de Castilla chose to step down as Baron and Baroness of Hammerhold and move to Axemoor. I often think they did so in order to live in the same place as the interesting folk who came up from the Gulf Coast to attend Hammerhold events.